My new temple made an effort to reach out to those under 30 and offers free membership for a year. But what upsets me is that they don't make an effort to address the a problem that I think of as the 'singular sensation'- the feeling that when you go to shul it is painfully obvious that you are there alone.
I went to Kol Nidrei last night at the local temple where I am (now) a member. Everyone at the temple seemed to know each other or was a bonafide nuclear family unit. It was so lonely and isolating. Why do I feel so uncomfortable? Why I am letting myself feel so uncomfortable? As I sat there alone I began to wonder if Christians who attend church services by themselves feel similarly?
From what I've read on the wonderful world wide web I understand that this seems to be a problem for single Jews, especially the more Orthodox ones who are really fixin' for a shidduch. I am tired of family members asking me if I've met anyone nice lately (and they don't mean friends). Though I'm lucky, my own family is not too bad when it comes to this. It's being posed questions like that or situations like the one in synagogue that I start to have a sense of inadequacy that might stem from not having a partner there with me. And then I wonder what is wrong with me for feeling this way....that I am too postmodern to all of this or that get to me.
On that note, I am off to shul for another round of 'stare at the single person'.