Saturday, September 24, 2005

Status: limbo

Transition times in life are never easy.
I feel as though I'm in limbo. Neither here nor there. People are moving. And moving on. I feel disembodied. Not a part of things. On the fringes of my former life.
I don't know what is to come for my future. I want to learn everything there is about this job, I want to conquer it and move up in the ranks. I anticipate that the career move I have made will work out, but one can never be without doubt. I sometimes fear that I am kidding myself, that I'm not good enough at what I (currently) do. That my learning curve is not fast enough. That I'll never move beyond my current salary or get health benefits. I worry some days that I seem to be failing at bonding with most of my co-workers. Sure, we chat and say hello. But I feel like I haven't really been able to interact that much in a more informal way (if that makes sense).


Plantation said...

Give yourself time. You know something? This will not be your last job so make the best of it, learn a lot, and take it to your next gig whenever that will be.

-Ann said...

You'll be grand. It just takes time. Every time I start a new job or activity, the night before, I regress into a kindegartner. I ask Peter "What happens if the other kids don't like me? What if they hate me? What if they laugh at me?"

It takes somes time to get adjusted, but it works out in the end. The important thing to remember is that this is all totally normal and you're not deficient in any way.

Good luck!